Year One - Gold

It has been days - 365 days to be exact when i crawled out of an already cracked shell and wrote my very first post - YOU. In the beginning, there wasn’t a definite plan you know - I just wanted to write, you know fuel the dream of publishing by age 20. I was already late anyways since I sat depressed on my birthday that year, reflecting in front of my physics textbook and realizing I failed my 15-year-old dream.

Many more dreams died this past year. Like the prince-charming-coming-to-save-the- damsel-in-distress dream. Like the I-should-get-what-I-want-immediately dream. Like the I-want-to-cut-people-up-in-surgery dream. Like the I-shouldn’t-be-struggling-with-these-issues dream.

But that is the beauty of death - any kind of death really... the ashes force you to look into the change. New life begins with two choices - you could keep looking back or you could forge ahead with ashes clutched in hand as a reminder that your perspective needs to keep changing. And so this-change came, and so did the focus of this blog. It is now about healing from the inside to the outside. And it is hard because I am still a sinner in the continual rehab of His Grace. I am realizing that I never had all the answers even though I would like to presume and show that I do. Every time I think I have arrived - I realize I only took baby steps instead.

Life has come from so many new areas. Like his-continual-grace. Like his-continual-corrections. Like the new-depths-of-friendships. Like new-perspectives. Like letting-go-of-the-past. Like realizing-I-was-never-in-control.

And there are many more, each post has a death and new life flow attached to it. I would love to open up more and say which each specific was/is you know - be bare and transparent and show you just how broken I am and let you see for yourself that it doesn’t matter if you are the same way too, more or less because He still is able to turn you around and over. And that is something along the lines of what my friend M spoke to me about. Opening up more, instead of leaving posts still on the periphery. And also, interjecting my faith verbally and physically, rather than just-pen-on-paper. Its a challenge... something that will be life long, even beyond this blog.

So i invite you, dear person whose eyes move across his/her screen, to keep me accountable. If this is your first time, welcome. If you have been here somewhere between day 0 and day 365 - thank you. There is going to be change - there are plans popping in my head, when i think about them, my blood gets warm and i feel my passion re-awakening. And I want to unveil them to you - patience is the key. I will soon share them with you, in excitement. I do hope you keep coming back and that somehow these words, of which i don’t believe originate from me alone, but somehow the Big-Man up there ignited the start of this something, touch you somewhere and inspire you to want to know Him.

Have a great week ahead!

And Happy Holidays in Advance :D - Check this out!